10 mindset shifts to bring you more clarity
—plus reflection prompts and actions to help you live them.
for when you’re evolving, untangling, and trying to figure it out.
I often think about what I needed to hear when I was younger or what I might need to remember when I’m older. These are the kinds of shifts I return to again and again. Some I’ve learned the hard way. Some I’m still working on. But all of them have helped me move through confusion, over-functioning, self-doubt, and burnout with a little more clarity.
Maybe one will meet you where you are. Maybe another will sit with you until you’re ready to hear it.
This is a bonus free newsletter to celebrate and kickoff Mental Health Awareness Month!
I’m giving away signed copies of my book and also a few audiobooks. Follow me on Instagram to join the giveaways throughout the month.
1. You’re allowed to change, even when it disappoints people.
Growth often means becoming someone others didn’t expect you to be. And that’s okay. Let people misunderstand you if staying misunderstood means being more honest with yourself. Staying in a version of yourself that keeps others comfortable is not a life—it’s a performance.
Reflect: Who do I fear disappointing if I grow in the direction I truly want?
Act: Make one small decision this week that aligns with your evolving self—not your past roles.
2. Being empathetic doesn’t mean absorbing everyone’s pain.
Empathy without boundaries becomes self-abandonment. You can care deeply and protect your capacity. You can hold space for someone else without erasing yourself in the process. Empathy that depletes you isn’t sustainable—it’s extraction.
Reflect: When was the last time I felt emotionally drained after supporting someone? Did I ignore any signals from my own body or needs in that moment?
Act: Before saying yes to holding space for someone, pause and ask yourself: “Do I have the capacity right now?” If not, offer a loving boundary: “I care about you deeply, and I want to be present for this—can we talk when I have more space to give you my full attention?”
3. You are not a self-improvement project.
You are not a problem to be fixed. Healing and growth don’t need to be productive. They can be slow, nonlinear, even invisible. You don’t need to earn your own acceptance through constant work. Sometimes rest is the work.
Reflect: What part of me still believes I have to earn rest, joy, or self-worth by achieving something first?
Act: Do one thing today not because it improves you, but because it nourishes you: rest, play, pleasure, or stillness. Let it be enough.
4. Let your life be shaped by your values, not by someone else’s urgency.
Urgency is often a projection of someone else’s anxiety. Don’t let it become your compass. When you’re constantly responding to what’s loudest or most immediate, you lose sight of what’s meaningful. Come back to your own rhythm.
Reflect: Whose urgency have I been prioritizing lately—and what has it pulled me away from?
Act: List your top 3 values. Then look at your calendar. Does your time reflect them? Choose one small adjustment this week that realigns your schedule with what matters most.
5. Sometimes clarity comes after the leap, not before.
There are decisions you can’t think your way into. You have to move, trust, feel your way forward. Some knowing only arrives once you’re in motion. Waiting for certainty can be a form of avoidance. Sometimes action is the clarity.
Reflect: What decision or change have I been postponing because I’m waiting to feel 100% ready?
Act: Take one small, brave step toward it—even if it’s imperfect. Make a call, schedule the thing, send the email. Momentum creates clarity.
6. Confusion doesn’t mean something’s wrong.
We’re so quick to pathologize confusion. But often, it’s just a sign that something is shifting under the surface. You’re outgrowing something. You’re reorienting. You’re making space for a new way of being. Confusion is the in-between—and that’s where real change begins.
Reflect: Where in my life am I feeling confused right now—and what might that confusion be trying to show me?
Act: Instead of rushing to solve it, name the feeling and give it space. Try journaling: “What am I outgrowing? What new possibility might be taking shape?”
7. There are no wrong decisions—only different versions of who you become.
Every path teaches you something. Every choice shapes you in some way. You don’t have to be certain it’s “right” to move forward. What matters is who you’re becoming through the process.
Reflect: What “mistake” am I still holding onto—and what did it teach me about who I am or what I want?
Act: Write a letter to your past self, thanking them for a decision that felt uncertain but shaped who you are today.
8. Starting over doesn’t mean you’ve failed.
It means you’re paying attention. It means you’re being honest. You’re allowed to change your mind, pivot your path, or rebuild from scratch—even if it’s uncomfortable. It’s not too late. It never was.
Reflect: What’s something I’ve been afraid to walk away from because I didn’t want it to “look like” failure?
Act: Give yourself permission to release it. Say out loud or write: “I am allowed to begin again. I don’t need permission to choose a better fit.”
9. You don’t find community—you build it.
There’s no magical place where the perfect people just show up. You build belonging by showing up, reaching out, asking better questions, and making space for connection—moment by moment. Be the one who goes first.
Reflect: Where in my life have I been waiting to be invited, rather than doing the inviting?
Act: Reach out to one person today. Ask a deeper question. Initiate a conversation or gathering. Be the one who goes first.
10. If your value is only recognized when you’re agreeable, productive, or self-sacrificing—it’s not real recognition.
That’s performance, not presence. You shouldn’t have to shrink, smooth your edges, or silence your needs to feel worthy. Your value is not conditional. The spaces that truly see you won’t require you to disappear.
Reflect: When have I hidden my needs or truth just to feel accepted or praised?
Act: Practice showing up with one truth or boundary this week—even if it’s small. Let it be a reminder that you are enough as you are.
These are some of the truths I’m holding close lately—some I’ve lived, some I’m still learning.
What would you add to this list?
Hit reply and tell me what mindset shift has helped you show up with more clarity, courage, or compassion lately. I’d love to hear.
That’s all for now! May your tables, health, and happiness be always in abundance.
Live well + be well xx,'
Israa
[Ps. My book, Toxic Productivity, is available everywhere books are sold. You can learn more about it here: https://www.israanasir.com/toxic-productivity ].
This mental Health Awareness Month, donate to (if you can) or volunteer with:
MSF (Doctors Without Borders): Provides urgent mental health and medical care to people affected by conflict, disasters, and displacement worldwide.
JED Foundation: Protects emotional health and prevents suicide among teens and young adults through education, policy, and community-building.
Active Minds: Empowers students to speak openly about mental health, creating supportive school communities and preventing stigma on campuses.
“You are not a problem to be fixed.” So so true.
It’s such a simple truth—and yet so hard to believe when we’re surrounded by constant messages telling us otherwise: fix your weight, your wrinkles, your messy house, your tone, your ambition. Be smaller. Be quieter. Be more of this, less of that. But we are not problems—we are people. Messy, complex, evolving. And worthy, just as we are. Self-improvement isn’t about fixing. It’s about becoming more of who you already are. More aligned. More expressed. More free to want what you want—especially when it’s on your agenda, not society’s.
This really resonated. I’m curious—was there a moment when you started to believe you weren’t something that needed to be fixed?