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JFT Beach 🇬🇧 🏊 🧘‍♂️'s avatar

Good advice. I found like minded people in my local sea swimming community and they tick every box in your list for authentic relationships. Happened one day when I randomly stumbled into them on the beach. Thanks for writing this, I just subscribed.

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Israa Nasir's avatar

i love to hear this! What a great way to meet new people!

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VV's avatar

Loneliness may come from an Abandonment wound or "mother hunger". So we may seek or work harder towards what is not available for approval/validation/worthiness/proof that we are enough. Letting go with questions about myself, shifting focus, and not centering myself has helped. I've settled into just not engaging now but then also wondering why no one is reaching out to me even when they are reminded of me by seeing me in person/text about kids/common activity. I'm not getting the vice versa when I do put energy out/ask a simple how are you/support a friend/etc. There is also a full anticipation and huge relief when things get cancelled.

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Israa Nasir's avatar

Loneliness, over time, can become chronic and complex. At some point, we begin to enjoy the safety/comfort/predictability of our own company, and engaging with others feels tiring; while at the same time, we want to be seen and connected. I'm curious about 'not centering myself' - would you mind sharing more on that?

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VV's avatar

Not centering myself that the reason is not me or something connect to me. Holding compassion for others that they may have something they are going thru, not the capacity, established connections that they go to first, other priorities, focused, full time jobs, etc.

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